my dad sent me the link to this article. is he trying to tell me something? the characteristics of the yogi in this article are almost entirely me. hmmm...
http://namaste-bitches.blogspot.com/2010/03/guide-to-dating-yoga-goddess-damsels.html
read on, read on. it's a bit long, but a good read.
z
Friday, February 22, 2013
Wednesday, February 20, 2013
the notorious 'pop in'
I love, love, LOVE Beverly Hills 90210 – and I’m talking about the good one with Luke Perry, not this new shit they have on TV. At any rate, I discovered they have reruns on the Soap Network every day. And it gets even better – I discovered this in the last season leading up to Donna and David’s wedding. Score!! So, I would DVR them during the day and watch them at night.
I noticed while watching my reruns that 90210 (the later years) is a series of scenes that begin with a ‘pop in’. Donna will just show up at the club to bitch at Noah about something. Dylan will just pop by Kelly and Donna’s beach apartment. Matt would just pop in on Kelly and fight with her about Dylan. Kelly would just pop by Matt’s law office to reassure him that nothing was going on between her and Dylan. Janet would stop by to see Steve and vice versa. Camille would pop by David’s to be comforted after their break-up, and then she would pop by the store to see Donna for a final farewell.
So I was curious – was this pattern secluded to only 90210? Or was this a trend with all day time TV? I couldn’t help but wonder. So, I watched some General Hospital during reruns on the weekend (that used to be my jam when I would stay home sick from school in my school days) and this is also a trend with General Hospital. Virtually every single scene is some random person popping by unannounced.
I, for one, do not like the ‘pop in’. I just don’t. You better let me know you’re coming over if you are – even if I’m seeing someone or something, boy better call a girl and let her know. There are a multitude of reasons for this and I’m sure most are aware and share my feelings surround the ‘pop in’. I could be sweaty and gross from a run or yoga – I do not want everyone to see that. Maybe I just got out of the shower. Perhaps my house is an absolute mess with clothes spewed everywhere. I like my house to be very clean when people come over. Also, I like my alone time. If I want a night alone not doing anything but laying around watching TV in my underwear and glasses, I want to reserve that right without some random person stopping by. I also have a routine after work on certain days – I like to keep it that way. If I want to make plans, I will.
Does this make me uptight and not spontaneous? That, I’m not so sure. I’d like to think I’m a fun person with a sense of adventure and whatnot, but do not fucking pop in on me unannounced. I don’t like it at all.
But seriously, people – check out these soaps for the pop in sequencing. Virtually every scene begins with a random pop-in.
Monday, February 18, 2013
a simple hello, and an awkward yoga turtle
i met someone very special this last weekend. he's adorable, sexy, hilarious beyond measure, and almost as awesome as me ;-) - i kid, i kid (well, kinda). that's all i'm going to say for now, but whatever we're getting into is going to be fun as shit.
and in other news, i had quite a large awkward turtle moment (well, a series of minutes rather) in yoga sunday morning. so, a couple of the teachers at this newer studio i go to have the class do partner work. i disagree with this for a few reasons:
1) some people just don't like to be touched
2) some people like to be touched, just not by a sweaty stranger (understandable)
3) adjusting someone when you are not properly trained to do so is dangerous. so you have these people in yoga class with their hands on someone else deepening them into a twist?!?! no ma'am - that shit is no buens. unless you can properly position your hands and body against the person you're adjusting and work with their breath, you're doing it wrong. i can't believe yoga teachers actually allow some of this adjusting-each-other-business to take place. my yoga teacher would be rendered speechless if she saw that.
4) i feel like this disrupts the flow of class - you stop this asana practice you're in, pair up with a stranger (and if you don't lock eyes with someone quickly and claim them as a partner, you are going to feel like the kid who was picked last in gym class), and then engage in this partner practice that i see little to no benefit of.
5) you can do partner yoga, but advertise it as that!! it's irritating to go into a class not expecting that and before you know it you're straddling some stranger.
which brings me to what happened sunday. needless to say from what i'm sure you all have gathered, we did some partner work in yoga on sunday. i am always in the same spot in yoga class - very back corner. there were an even number of people in my row, so when kelly told us to pair off i assumed the chick next to me would turn to be to be her partner, but she turned to the chick on her right!! i figured she could count, figure out we had six on the row, so the pairs are already set up. so, that left me and this man on my row to be paired together.
i don't like strangers touching me, and it's even more awkward turtle to have a strange man touching you and vice versa. and a strange man with his 'bulge' just hanging out for all to see in his more fitted shorts. we were adjusting reclined twists and i had to sit right behind his ass, grab his hip bone down low, and then his shoulder and move and adjust with his breath blah blah. then i had to place my hand on his thigh and do the same thing. and he did this same adjusting to me. then, no shit, i had to stand up and straddle his head are while he was laying down on his back, bend over, and try to fold his knees into his chest - as he did me. for those that know me, y'all know that situations like this cause me to have quite the case of the giggles - and in this case, they were the church giggles - you know, when you can't stop laughing but you're in a place where laughing is totally inappropriate? uh, yea.
and so it goes, people. i'll be back with more shit later :)
1) some people just don't like to be touched
2) some people like to be touched, just not by a sweaty stranger (understandable)
3) adjusting someone when you are not properly trained to do so is dangerous. so you have these people in yoga class with their hands on someone else deepening them into a twist?!?! no ma'am - that shit is no buens. unless you can properly position your hands and body against the person you're adjusting and work with their breath, you're doing it wrong. i can't believe yoga teachers actually allow some of this adjusting-each-other-business to take place. my yoga teacher would be rendered speechless if she saw that.
4) i feel like this disrupts the flow of class - you stop this asana practice you're in, pair up with a stranger (and if you don't lock eyes with someone quickly and claim them as a partner, you are going to feel like the kid who was picked last in gym class), and then engage in this partner practice that i see little to no benefit of.
5) you can do partner yoga, but advertise it as that!! it's irritating to go into a class not expecting that and before you know it you're straddling some stranger.
which brings me to what happened sunday. needless to say from what i'm sure you all have gathered, we did some partner work in yoga on sunday. i am always in the same spot in yoga class - very back corner. there were an even number of people in my row, so when kelly told us to pair off i assumed the chick next to me would turn to be to be her partner, but she turned to the chick on her right!! i figured she could count, figure out we had six on the row, so the pairs are already set up. so, that left me and this man on my row to be paired together.
i don't like strangers touching me, and it's even more awkward turtle to have a strange man touching you and vice versa. and a strange man with his 'bulge' just hanging out for all to see in his more fitted shorts. we were adjusting reclined twists and i had to sit right behind his ass, grab his hip bone down low, and then his shoulder and move and adjust with his breath blah blah. then i had to place my hand on his thigh and do the same thing. and he did this same adjusting to me. then, no shit, i had to stand up and straddle his head are while he was laying down on his back, bend over, and try to fold his knees into his chest - as he did me. for those that know me, y'all know that situations like this cause me to have quite the case of the giggles - and in this case, they were the church giggles - you know, when you can't stop laughing but you're in a place where laughing is totally inappropriate? uh, yea.
and so it goes, people. i'll be back with more shit later :)
Thursday, February 14, 2013
steve martin's take on love
"When a man meets the woman he loves... his heart races, his head spins, and the dozens and dozens of women he's sleeping with no longer matter. Every man needs a woman, and I need you. To lift me when I am sad, to comfort me when I am down, to clean me when I am drunk, to walk beside me when I want to look like I'm not gay, to walk in front of me when I need someone to act as a human windshield, to kiss me when I am horny, to massage me when I am tense &/or horny, to make me horny when I am not horny, and then to watch me fall asleep."
"I need you, darling, to clean between my toes when they are not clean to my satisfaction, to pick the nits out of my hair when I have head lice, to try milk for me when I am not sure of the expiration date, to be there when I need you to be there, and to be out of town the rest of the time. My darling, although it may seem sentimental, I want to take this moment to tell you I love you. Because I don't want to lose half my stuff."
Steve Martin monologue on Saturday Night Live, 05/21/1989
"I need you, darling, to clean between my toes when they are not clean to my satisfaction, to pick the nits out of my hair when I have head lice, to try milk for me when I am not sure of the expiration date, to be there when I need you to be there, and to be out of town the rest of the time. My darling, although it may seem sentimental, I want to take this moment to tell you I love you. Because I don't want to lose half my stuff."
Steve Martin monologue on Saturday Night Live, 05/21/1989
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Observations from the grocery store
i posted a cliffnotes version of this on my facebook a while back, but i thought of this list yesterday and wanted to elaborate a bit and put it in my blog :)
1) I am a self-admitted food snob, and I'm totally cool with it. Thanks for showing me the way, Mama. I shop at Central Market, don't like to shop elsewhere, and if that makes me a snob then okay. sure, it's more expensive than your local walmart or whatever, but the food is worth the money - like my daddy always says, you get what you pay for. i swear that fish and meat from heb tastes different, and the strawberries from target fail in comparison to those i buy at central market. in fact, one of the deciding factors of me choosing my apartment over others is because it is directly across the street from central market. being conveniently and strategically placed near a whole foods or central market will always play a role in me picking places to live.
2) I am very OCD with my grocery shopping and the organization of my cart - produce on the top part, bulk stacked nicely on one side of the bottom, and meats on theother side in appropriate health code stacking order. it bothers me when my cart is a bit runneth over and this arrangement is somewhat compromised.
take yesterday for example... i had to get a bit more 'odd' items than i would normally and it totally interfered with my cart organization. i had to get a couple household cleaners, and that took up precious cart space. and this seriously kind of bothered me. i prefer when it's all neat and stacked and organized, to which i failed miserably yesterday.
3) I have a big crush on my fish market guy and his fuzzy beard. he was not there yesterday and i was getting fish!! oh how i wished he was there to call out 'number fifty FIVE'! but alas, he was not.
this leads me to another question - well, kinda. so, do people ever meet at the grocery store? and if so, in what WORLD does this happen and HOW does it happen? okay, so you know how when you go to the grocery store you kinda shop with a group of people - like, you start in the produce section and the people around you are following the same flow of traffic so y'all kinda stick together. okay. so it has happened before (not yesterday) that a handsome fella is in my 'group', and we exchanged a few glances and smiles and then that was it. like, how does the introduction happen? how are people supposed to meet people after college and outside of work? it's quite the enigma.
4) People who just stop in the middle of the aisle stopping all traffic really frost my cookies - their cluelessness blows my mind every time. like, they're in the middle of the aisle where the traffic flow is at its peak, and then they just stop and look around with their head in the clouds and the carts and shoppers are building up behind them. i take my little cart and park it in a corner or some inconspicuous place where there is little traffic and it's out of the way, and then i take my list, grab some stuff, and then return to my cart. i don't get these stop-in-the-middle-of-the-aisle people that are completely unaware of their surroundings. and then when they see you and finally realize they blocking traffic, they're like, 'oh my goodness. i'm so sorry' as if they thought they were somehow out of the way and shocked that they were. really?
5) I'm equally as OCD about how my food is bagged - I always do it myself. i like my produce all together, meat in a separate plastic bag, and dry goods in another bag - i do not like them mixed. on a related note - it blows my mind when people do not help bag and just stand there fiddling with their phone or something whilst the checker rings in their loot, keep fiddling while the loot builds up on the end, and then continues to stand there watching the checker bag their stuff even sometimes dropping 'suggestions' on how to arrange their groceries. this scenario is almost awkward to behold. blows my mind. like, help the checker out and bag your groceries while he's ringing up everything. i think it's rude to not.
6) I buy fresh flowers for myself every week to keep on my kitchen table - they make me very happy. i normally get the $3 bunch ones, but sometimes i do splurge if i find a bouquet that calls to me. i love plants and love fresh flowers in my house - love.
**one of my keys on my keyboard just came loose and i can't re-attach it. boo. thank god it's just the =/+ key**
7) I secretly love it when I have a baller parking spot and there are a couple cars waiting for it when I'm pulling out. This somehow makes me feel like a badass. there's always a bit more pep in my step when i'm circling around during the busy weekends and then all of a sudden the spot next to the handicapped spot opens up - it's like the heavens have opened just for me to have this amazeballs parking spot. and then when i'm loading up my stuff, i feel like i'm mentally high-fiving the lucky sob that got my spot. heyo!!
8) I cook gourmet food for myself and love it. Some people have said that's kinda weird (since it's just me) and even given me a weird look, but I love to cook and love good food (and sometimes I pretend I have a cooking show). sometimes when i do cook, i wish that someone was there to cook for. sure, i cook for friends sometimes - but that's only sometimes. sometimes i do with that i had a man to cook for, and find myself looking forward to cooking for some kids one day. and i always have to quarter or half recipes instead of cooking the whole thing - this can be challenging when you then have to boil a half cup of water (hard to do without it turning to vapor almost immediately).
9) I will rip my arms off trying to get all my groceries inside in one trip - I refuse to take two. Taking two feels like I would be surrendering.
10) I thoroughly enjoy putting all my groceries away and organizing my fridge, freezer, and pantry again every week - makes me feel quite accomplished. i always have my meals planned ahead of time, so i do any prep work i can beforehand - chop vegetables, marinating meat, go ahead and cook the bulgar or couscous, and i make my fruit salad to have for the week. seriously, this saves so much time and makes cooking during the week easier. i've had friends ask me how i have time to cook during the week, and i tell them the sunday trick - get that shit prepped and ready to go - huge timesaver for those weekday meals.
1) I am a self-admitted food snob, and I'm totally cool with it. Thanks for showing me the way, Mama. I shop at Central Market, don't like to shop elsewhere, and if that makes me a snob then okay. sure, it's more expensive than your local walmart or whatever, but the food is worth the money - like my daddy always says, you get what you pay for. i swear that fish and meat from heb tastes different, and the strawberries from target fail in comparison to those i buy at central market. in fact, one of the deciding factors of me choosing my apartment over others is because it is directly across the street from central market. being conveniently and strategically placed near a whole foods or central market will always play a role in me picking places to live.
2) I am very OCD with my grocery shopping and the organization of my cart - produce on the top part, bulk stacked nicely on one side of the bottom, and meats on theother side in appropriate health code stacking order. it bothers me when my cart is a bit runneth over and this arrangement is somewhat compromised.
take yesterday for example... i had to get a bit more 'odd' items than i would normally and it totally interfered with my cart organization. i had to get a couple household cleaners, and that took up precious cart space. and this seriously kind of bothered me. i prefer when it's all neat and stacked and organized, to which i failed miserably yesterday.
3) I have a big crush on my fish market guy and his fuzzy beard. he was not there yesterday and i was getting fish!! oh how i wished he was there to call out 'number fifty FIVE'! but alas, he was not.
this leads me to another question - well, kinda. so, do people ever meet at the grocery store? and if so, in what WORLD does this happen and HOW does it happen? okay, so you know how when you go to the grocery store you kinda shop with a group of people - like, you start in the produce section and the people around you are following the same flow of traffic so y'all kinda stick together. okay. so it has happened before (not yesterday) that a handsome fella is in my 'group', and we exchanged a few glances and smiles and then that was it. like, how does the introduction happen? how are people supposed to meet people after college and outside of work? it's quite the enigma.
4) People who just stop in the middle of the aisle stopping all traffic really frost my cookies - their cluelessness blows my mind every time. like, they're in the middle of the aisle where the traffic flow is at its peak, and then they just stop and look around with their head in the clouds and the carts and shoppers are building up behind them. i take my little cart and park it in a corner or some inconspicuous place where there is little traffic and it's out of the way, and then i take my list, grab some stuff, and then return to my cart. i don't get these stop-in-the-middle-of-the-aisle people that are completely unaware of their surroundings. and then when they see you and finally realize they blocking traffic, they're like, 'oh my goodness. i'm so sorry' as if they thought they were somehow out of the way and shocked that they were. really?
5) I'm equally as OCD about how my food is bagged - I always do it myself. i like my produce all together, meat in a separate plastic bag, and dry goods in another bag - i do not like them mixed. on a related note - it blows my mind when people do not help bag and just stand there fiddling with their phone or something whilst the checker rings in their loot, keep fiddling while the loot builds up on the end, and then continues to stand there watching the checker bag their stuff even sometimes dropping 'suggestions' on how to arrange their groceries. this scenario is almost awkward to behold. blows my mind. like, help the checker out and bag your groceries while he's ringing up everything. i think it's rude to not.
6) I buy fresh flowers for myself every week to keep on my kitchen table - they make me very happy. i normally get the $3 bunch ones, but sometimes i do splurge if i find a bouquet that calls to me. i love plants and love fresh flowers in my house - love.
**one of my keys on my keyboard just came loose and i can't re-attach it. boo. thank god it's just the =/+ key**
7) I secretly love it when I have a baller parking spot and there are a couple cars waiting for it when I'm pulling out. This somehow makes me feel like a badass. there's always a bit more pep in my step when i'm circling around during the busy weekends and then all of a sudden the spot next to the handicapped spot opens up - it's like the heavens have opened just for me to have this amazeballs parking spot. and then when i'm loading up my stuff, i feel like i'm mentally high-fiving the lucky sob that got my spot. heyo!!
8) I cook gourmet food for myself and love it. Some people have said that's kinda weird (since it's just me) and even given me a weird look, but I love to cook and love good food (and sometimes I pretend I have a cooking show). sometimes when i do cook, i wish that someone was there to cook for. sure, i cook for friends sometimes - but that's only sometimes. sometimes i do with that i had a man to cook for, and find myself looking forward to cooking for some kids one day. and i always have to quarter or half recipes instead of cooking the whole thing - this can be challenging when you then have to boil a half cup of water (hard to do without it turning to vapor almost immediately).
9) I will rip my arms off trying to get all my groceries inside in one trip - I refuse to take two. Taking two feels like I would be surrendering.
10) I thoroughly enjoy putting all my groceries away and organizing my fridge, freezer, and pantry again every week - makes me feel quite accomplished. i always have my meals planned ahead of time, so i do any prep work i can beforehand - chop vegetables, marinating meat, go ahead and cook the bulgar or couscous, and i make my fruit salad to have for the week. seriously, this saves so much time and makes cooking during the week easier. i've had friends ask me how i have time to cook during the week, and i tell them the sunday trick - get that shit prepped and ready to go - huge timesaver for those weekday meals.
Thursday, February 7, 2013
sinus cold/brochitis/yucky sick stuff = 2, zoe = 0
i have been sick twice so far this year, and we're only a little over a month in to 2013. This time i have been sick since i drove back into town sunday - i felt fine while i was in dallas, and then i drove into a cloud of cedar and mold crap and went from feeling fine to horrible in about an hour's time. i've been down with a sinus infection and a touch of bronchitis, and am just a hot mess.
i've been having to juggle work and being sick, which totally sucks. all i want to do when i feel bad like this is lay down on the couch under a blanket with my toby watching crap tv.
i had a brilliant idea for a business venture today on my way to the grocery store and pharmacy for the second time this week. what really sucks is having to leave the house when you're sick - you obivously don't look your best, your snotty, face looks like a punching bag, hair is all over the place, and the last thing you want to do is run into someone you're forced to have a conversation with. i can go to the doctor pretty easily - she is literally right across the street (i'm talking yards), and i can go in there looking like ass and not care because they see hot mess sick people all damn day. but i hate having to get out to go to the store to get medicine, cough syrup, stuff to make soup (then subsequently having to make the soup), ice cream, you get the picture - i'm sure i'm not alone in this.
so here's my brilliant idea - a drive through pharmacy. but not just a drive through pharmacy, a drive through sick store/pharmacy that has all the things you may want or need when you're under the weather. these items include, but are not limited to:
1) prescribed meds and any over-the-counter meds, cough drops, vicks, ointments, vitamins, what-have-you
2) gingerale. whether i have an upset stomach or whether i have what i have now, i love gingerale. i don't know what it is about it. it is settling for the stomach and digestive system, but the carbonation feels good on a sore throat and it's not too sweet.
3) juice, gatorade, hot tea, and any other liquid that may sooth the ailing throat or stomach. and if you get the hot tea, it's already steeping in a cup - it's all ready to go.
4) ice cream, fro yo, popsicles - being sick is an awesome excuse to enjoy all three of these and the smooth cold feels awesome on a sore throat.
5) kleenex - obviously
6) homemade chicken soup. this is a big one. cooking seems like such a chore when i'm sick, but canned soup is totally disgusting and the food snob in me refuses to surrender to such things. i bit the bullet the other day and purchased what i needed to in order to make chicken soup, but it was exhausting - not gonna lie. so, my sick store would sell homemade chicken soup - and the good kind with the noodles.
7) any other foods that sick people like - crackers, ramen, applesauce, etc.
8) sweat pants and pajamas. if you're having to stay home in bed or on the couch for a few days, you're gonna need plenty of clean jams and sweats and sometimes you just run out and then you have to contemplate whether doing the exhausting chore of laundry is worth it (see 11 below).
9) vaporizors
10) my dog is my buddy always, but definitely when i feel crappy. i think toby knows when i feel bad because he attaches himself to me, gives me kisses, naps with me, and helps me feel better. therefore, my sick store could have some sort of foster service in which people without dogs can, in a sense, 'check out' a dog to take home while they're sick. this idea probably wouldn't work and you also don't want a whole bunch of crazies out there 'renting' dogs, but the reason behind the idea makes sense.
11) a possible laundry service. doing daily activities and chores suck balls when you're sick, and being able to drop off some dirty clothes and pick them up all warm and clean and fresh would be small victory in a seemingly uphill battle.
12) magazines and books, but also a video rental service. for those of us that don't stream netflix, including myself, waiting for two movies to come through the snail mail just isn't sufficient when you need to keep yourself entertained and lazy all day long. so, you could go use the red box or whatever that is inside of the drive through sick pharmacy.
12) emergen-c on tap and/or airborne on tap. they keep these mixed in tea urns sometimes at work, and it's awesome - my sick drive through would have these as well, and only in the good flavors.
austin used to have a lot of these drive through convenient stores - i'm sure we still do, i just haven't been to one in years. but, they were awesome - you could drive through and pick up some cigarettes, beer, dr pepper, and a snack. how baller is that? this would really take that idea to the next level - i seriously think i have a winner idea here. and it would be especially successful in central texas where allergies are straight from the devil and someone is always sick.
so there you have it - a stroke of brilliance during this sick gross week of mine.
i've been having to juggle work and being sick, which totally sucks. all i want to do when i feel bad like this is lay down on the couch under a blanket with my toby watching crap tv.
i had a brilliant idea for a business venture today on my way to the grocery store and pharmacy for the second time this week. what really sucks is having to leave the house when you're sick - you obivously don't look your best, your snotty, face looks like a punching bag, hair is all over the place, and the last thing you want to do is run into someone you're forced to have a conversation with. i can go to the doctor pretty easily - she is literally right across the street (i'm talking yards), and i can go in there looking like ass and not care because they see hot mess sick people all damn day. but i hate having to get out to go to the store to get medicine, cough syrup, stuff to make soup (then subsequently having to make the soup), ice cream, you get the picture - i'm sure i'm not alone in this.
so here's my brilliant idea - a drive through pharmacy. but not just a drive through pharmacy, a drive through sick store/pharmacy that has all the things you may want or need when you're under the weather. these items include, but are not limited to:
1) prescribed meds and any over-the-counter meds, cough drops, vicks, ointments, vitamins, what-have-you
2) gingerale. whether i have an upset stomach or whether i have what i have now, i love gingerale. i don't know what it is about it. it is settling for the stomach and digestive system, but the carbonation feels good on a sore throat and it's not too sweet.
3) juice, gatorade, hot tea, and any other liquid that may sooth the ailing throat or stomach. and if you get the hot tea, it's already steeping in a cup - it's all ready to go.
4) ice cream, fro yo, popsicles - being sick is an awesome excuse to enjoy all three of these and the smooth cold feels awesome on a sore throat.
5) kleenex - obviously
6) homemade chicken soup. this is a big one. cooking seems like such a chore when i'm sick, but canned soup is totally disgusting and the food snob in me refuses to surrender to such things. i bit the bullet the other day and purchased what i needed to in order to make chicken soup, but it was exhausting - not gonna lie. so, my sick store would sell homemade chicken soup - and the good kind with the noodles.
7) any other foods that sick people like - crackers, ramen, applesauce, etc.
8) sweat pants and pajamas. if you're having to stay home in bed or on the couch for a few days, you're gonna need plenty of clean jams and sweats and sometimes you just run out and then you have to contemplate whether doing the exhausting chore of laundry is worth it (see 11 below).
9) vaporizors
10) my dog is my buddy always, but definitely when i feel crappy. i think toby knows when i feel bad because he attaches himself to me, gives me kisses, naps with me, and helps me feel better. therefore, my sick store could have some sort of foster service in which people without dogs can, in a sense, 'check out' a dog to take home while they're sick. this idea probably wouldn't work and you also don't want a whole bunch of crazies out there 'renting' dogs, but the reason behind the idea makes sense.
11) a possible laundry service. doing daily activities and chores suck balls when you're sick, and being able to drop off some dirty clothes and pick them up all warm and clean and fresh would be small victory in a seemingly uphill battle.
12) magazines and books, but also a video rental service. for those of us that don't stream netflix, including myself, waiting for two movies to come through the snail mail just isn't sufficient when you need to keep yourself entertained and lazy all day long. so, you could go use the red box or whatever that is inside of the drive through sick pharmacy.
12) emergen-c on tap and/or airborne on tap. they keep these mixed in tea urns sometimes at work, and it's awesome - my sick drive through would have these as well, and only in the good flavors.
austin used to have a lot of these drive through convenient stores - i'm sure we still do, i just haven't been to one in years. but, they were awesome - you could drive through and pick up some cigarettes, beer, dr pepper, and a snack. how baller is that? this would really take that idea to the next level - i seriously think i have a winner idea here. and it would be especially successful in central texas where allergies are straight from the devil and someone is always sick.
so there you have it - a stroke of brilliance during this sick gross week of mine.
Monday, February 4, 2013
#2
this blog entry is about poop, and i might share too much information by your standards. if you think this is gross or inappropriate that's fine - stop reading - my feelings shant be hurt.
poop. we all do it on a daily basis, and for some reason there's some stigma attached to it. using the bathroom is a very personal activity, that is understandable - but why is peeing more acceptable than pooping? why is one's poop some secret that everyone kinda keeps to themselves and almost acts embarassed if they are caught in the act of poo'ing or if someone else knows they are poo'ing at that instant?
pooping at work sucks - no getting around that. and it's awkward. this is one of the reasons i love working from home - i live alone, have full access to my own bathroom and privacy, and so anytime i need to 'go' i can without reservation. however, pooping at work can pose a problem. i'm one of those people that likes privacy while partaking in this particular bathroom activity, which i'm sure is the norm here. but why can we pee while even letting out an audible sigh of relief with others around with no reservation, but quitly pooping with others in the restroom is so difficult? and i'm guilty of that.
i cannot go when someone else is in the bathroom - if i have just sat down and someone else walks in, i will abort the mission. and have you ever walked into the bathoom to 'go' when someone else is there - you know they're in that stall, and you have obviously interrupted them? then both of y'all are just sitting there in awkward poop silence waiting for the other to zip up and leave the other in peace - and it sucks to be the one that has to surrender. it's almost like a game of chicken. do you ever just want to call out, 'girl, just go - it's okay - just go.' i've been tempted (can you imagine the reaction?), but instead i will surrender and walk out anxiously awaiting the next opportunity. we've all been there, you know what i mean - we are all in this together.
and another thing that sucks...
when you start dating someone and having 'sleepovers', it is often hard to break away for the privacy to poop without the other knowing. this especially poses a problem when either party lives in a small one bedroom, one bathroom residence - such as myself. you can sometimes do the trick where you go and to take a shower and poop while you are in the safety of the sound of running water and a locked door, but that doesn't always work. now, i want to make it perfectly clear i do not have frequent 'overnights' - the opposite is true in fact. but, y'all know what i'm talking about - when you start seeing someone and on the verge of entering a potential relationship, this does come up.
i have a 'special' friend who i've had overnights with in the past and recently had an extended weekend with. and the thing that's weird is that we are close friends and have been for years, but once you've slept someone and crossed that line (as we did), something changes. before i didn't care if he knew i had just pooped in the bathroom but now for some reason it quite bothers me - i avoid it! and what's odd about that is that he is so casual about poop. like, he's told me he has to poop before - then goes in the bathroom and i know that's what he's doing. it doesn't bother me at all - in fact, it's quite refreshing. so why do i think it's a big deal? i recently went to visit him for a few days, and i just couldn't bring myself to go in his house. like, i didn't want to risk getting 'caught' or something. so then i found myself awaiting any opportunity i had when we went out to 'go'. it was kinda ridiculous, and because i felt i had to hold it i was uncomfortable for a good part of the trip.
i have a yoga teacher who said during a workshop that one of the cool things about teaching yoga is that you can talk to other yogis freely about poop and sex - yoga enhances both greatly. this is no secret to those that practice regularly. i love yogis for this reason - we love to poop, we don't hesitate talking about it, and that's awesome.
that's all i have for now - poop.
poop. we all do it on a daily basis, and for some reason there's some stigma attached to it. using the bathroom is a very personal activity, that is understandable - but why is peeing more acceptable than pooping? why is one's poop some secret that everyone kinda keeps to themselves and almost acts embarassed if they are caught in the act of poo'ing or if someone else knows they are poo'ing at that instant?
pooping at work sucks - no getting around that. and it's awkward. this is one of the reasons i love working from home - i live alone, have full access to my own bathroom and privacy, and so anytime i need to 'go' i can without reservation. however, pooping at work can pose a problem. i'm one of those people that likes privacy while partaking in this particular bathroom activity, which i'm sure is the norm here. but why can we pee while even letting out an audible sigh of relief with others around with no reservation, but quitly pooping with others in the restroom is so difficult? and i'm guilty of that.
i cannot go when someone else is in the bathroom - if i have just sat down and someone else walks in, i will abort the mission. and have you ever walked into the bathoom to 'go' when someone else is there - you know they're in that stall, and you have obviously interrupted them? then both of y'all are just sitting there in awkward poop silence waiting for the other to zip up and leave the other in peace - and it sucks to be the one that has to surrender. it's almost like a game of chicken. do you ever just want to call out, 'girl, just go - it's okay - just go.' i've been tempted (can you imagine the reaction?), but instead i will surrender and walk out anxiously awaiting the next opportunity. we've all been there, you know what i mean - we are all in this together.
and another thing that sucks...
when you start dating someone and having 'sleepovers', it is often hard to break away for the privacy to poop without the other knowing. this especially poses a problem when either party lives in a small one bedroom, one bathroom residence - such as myself. you can sometimes do the trick where you go and to take a shower and poop while you are in the safety of the sound of running water and a locked door, but that doesn't always work. now, i want to make it perfectly clear i do not have frequent 'overnights' - the opposite is true in fact. but, y'all know what i'm talking about - when you start seeing someone and on the verge of entering a potential relationship, this does come up.
i have a 'special' friend who i've had overnights with in the past and recently had an extended weekend with. and the thing that's weird is that we are close friends and have been for years, but once you've slept someone and crossed that line (as we did), something changes. before i didn't care if he knew i had just pooped in the bathroom but now for some reason it quite bothers me - i avoid it! and what's odd about that is that he is so casual about poop. like, he's told me he has to poop before - then goes in the bathroom and i know that's what he's doing. it doesn't bother me at all - in fact, it's quite refreshing. so why do i think it's a big deal? i recently went to visit him for a few days, and i just couldn't bring myself to go in his house. like, i didn't want to risk getting 'caught' or something. so then i found myself awaiting any opportunity i had when we went out to 'go'. it was kinda ridiculous, and because i felt i had to hold it i was uncomfortable for a good part of the trip.
i have a yoga teacher who said during a workshop that one of the cool things about teaching yoga is that you can talk to other yogis freely about poop and sex - yoga enhances both greatly. this is no secret to those that practice regularly. i love yogis for this reason - we love to poop, we don't hesitate talking about it, and that's awesome.
that's all i have for now - poop.
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